Friday, January 3, 2014

Forgiveness (not JUST a great song by The Eagles).

Forgiveness.

It’s not just a great song by The Eagles (although it is that too).

I've come to discover that I can identify the exact moment when I've forgiven someone. Usually, I’m just going about my day, and something will happen that reminds me of that person, and suddenly, I realize, that I have forgiven them.

For example, recently, I was driving along and I had a quick thought of someone who had recently really hurt me. And in my mind, I asked myself, “What will I do if I see him again this year?” And my subconscious answered for me and said, “Well, I guess you’ll just have to accept the way things are and just be okay with it.” And I realized that it was a step towards forgiveness. If there was a meter that could measure a person’s level of forgiveness towards another person, mine would have been at about 80% right then.

And then today, I was on a social media site where I saw some pictures that he had recently posted. They were your usual, “I’m taking a picture of my coffee and the journal I’m writing in” kind of photos. And instead of continuing to scroll to the next person’s post, I lingered for a moment and looked. In both pictures, was the journal that I had given him. And I don’t know why, but my heart got warmer, and I realized I was glad that he was using my gift to him. I was glad that he found joy in the journal.

And suddenly, I realized that my forgiveness meter had reached a full 100%.

I didn't care anymore about the ways he had wronged me. I didn't care anymore about the hurtful things he had said, or the fact that our once-beautiful relationship had crumbled. None of that mattered anymore. Sure, it still hurts, but it doesn't matter. It is over. It is done. I have survived, and I have forgiven.

And let me tell you, forgiveness really isn't for the person being forgiven. It’s for the person doing the forgiving.

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